(1389) CHESS JOKES (Part 7) HALF-DEAD; MERMAID' DOCTOR, GM, BOXER

RUSSIAN IM ANDREI OBUDCHUK, right, BECAME FRIEND OF ROBERTO HERNANDEZ OF PALAU THROUGH FACEBOOK AFTER THEIR 2ND ROUND ENCOUNTER IN THE 2014 WORLD CHESS OLYMPIAD IN TROMSO, NORWAY.
                             (Photo by Roberto Hernandez)



               CHESS JOKES (Part 7)

                                          HALF DEAD

                When Palau Open Chess Team played IPCA in the 2^nd round of 2014 World Chess Olympiad in Norway, Roberto is playing against Russian IM Andrei Obudchuk, who is playing while sitting after getting off a wheel chair. Roberto remembers when he had a conversation with a guy on a wheel chair, who said “It’s the most difficult part in one’s life to have your body “half dead”.

                Roberto asked, “Is it because you can’t have sex anymore?”

                He said, “No! It’s because I can’t buy half casket!”

     DOCTOR, GRANDMASTER AND BOXER

                There’s a triplet (boys) inside the womb of their mother and they are talking about what would be their profession when they grow up.

                The first one said, “I would like to be a doctor and I would take care of our parents when they grow old.”

                The second one replied with, “I would like to be a chess Grand Master like our dad, who almost won the world championship.”

                The 3^rd one’s reply makes the other two wondering, “I would like to be a boxer like Manny Pacquiao!” The other 2 asked why.

                He said, “So that I can fight the ‘bald’ guy who keeps punching us!”

             FIRST TIME IN ELEVATOR

                There are 2 amateur chess players from the province who qualified for national championship. They have to travel by ship and bus to get to the venue in the city.

                The venue is a 5-star 18-storey building. They need to use the elevator. Both of them are first timers in using an elevator.

                The older one pretends that it’s not his first time in an elevator. The other one is nervous and ask him, “How much we will pay for this ride?”

                He replied angrily, “Stupid! Moron! Why would we pay? We don’t have receipt yet!”

     MILITARY DAD WITH A GAY SON                                                       

                It’s very embarrassing for a tough military guy to have a gay son. His other 3 sons became a soldier, an architect and an International Master in chess. The youngest one is presumed to be gay.

                The father got an idea on how to ‘convert’ his son to a real manhood.

                He brings him to the river for a swim. In the deeper part of the river, he holds the head of his gay son by the hair and dipped it to the water for 30 seconds. He is still gasping for breath when his dad shouted at him—“Are you a man or a woman?”

                He replied “Woman!” His father dipped him again to the water, this time for 1 minute.

                He asked the same question and he answered the same although barely saying it because of gasping for breath.

                For the 3^rd time, the father dipped him again to the water for 2 minutes!

                The poor boy has drunk a lot of water. His father asked him one more time—

“Are you a man or a woman?”

                She answered—“Mermaid!”

Sources: Chess Mate by Roberto Hernandez

              Tia Belau Newspaper

              December 29, 2002 --June 04, 2017

              Chess and Music (Perfect Combination)

              The Beginning of Chess in Palau

              By Roberto Hernandez

              Soon to be published as a book

              Music and Me by Roberto Hernandez

              Tia Belau Newspaper

              March 15, 2012 -- April 18, 2013

              http://palau-chess.blogspot.com

              April 25, 2013--June 04, 2017

              The History of Chess in Palau

              By Roberto Hernandez

              June 09, 2002 -- June 04, 2017

(818) KNOW YOUR OPPONENT AND YOURSELF (TBN-Oct. 27, 2014)

FIRST MEETING AFTER 25 YEARS

                     GM Darwin Laylo, right, is a member of Philippine Team to the 2010 World Chess Olympiad in Khanty-Mansiysk, Russia together with chess prodigy GM Wesley So, middle, and Roberto Hernandez, left. GM Laylo and Roberto played a drawn game in 1989 and met again in Sept. 2011 during the 18^th birthday celebration of GM So.       (Photo by Roberto Hernandez  -- Taken by Tito Cabunagan)

         KNOW YOUR OPPONENT

                AND YOURSELF 

CHESS Grandmasters (GM) all around the world advised players (beginners or masters) to study their opponents’ games at least 40 of their games to know their styles, strengths, weaknesses and their favorite openings.

                During the World Chess Olympiad, held every two years, this advise seems impossible to do because you were given only 16 hours to prepare even with the help of Chessbase, where you can get information about any player you search.

                It happens in the recently concluded 2014 World Chess Olympiad in Tromso, Norway that Palau Board 1 player Roberto Hernandez prepared against his opponent, International Master (IM) Andrei Obudchuk of Russia, representing IPCA (International Physically Disabled Chess Association). He’s got 16 hours to study 89 available games of IM Obudchuk. Roberto was able to reduce it in half by studying only the games that IM Odubchuk had played as white, because he will be handling the white pieces in the 2^nd round against Palau. Roberto was able to reduce it further by studying only those games that IM Obudchuk has lost playing the white pieces.

                For sure, Mr. Obudchuk also researched about Roberto’s available games (more than 30) at Chessbase –8 games from 2009 Oceania Zonal Chess Championship in Australia; 11 games from Istanbul, Turkey Olympiad, 9 games from 2006 Palau Invitational Chess Championship and 9 games from 2011 3^rd PICC.

                If you study one game in one hour, it’s really not enough but at least, you will be getting an idea of how good that player is, what are his/her favorite openings and his/her style of play.

                In the 2003 Senior and Junior Chess Tournament, Roberto applied this advice against his penultimate round opponent Cyril Montel, Jr. in Nov. 30, 2003. But he’s got only 16 available games of Cyril. Still, he noticed that as white, both of them always starts with 1. e4 and in those games of them, Roberto never open with 1. d4.

                When they played with Roberto as white, he opened with 1. d4 and Cyril thought for 5 minutes before his first move! Cyril is never expecting a 1. d4 opening from Roberto. This has psychological effect on Cyril and he lost easily in 32 moves.

                Roberto added something about this advice: KNOW ALSO YOURSELF!

To know yourself better, you must have a record of all your games. CM Joselito Marcos, Roberto’s best friend, have more than 700 games in his chess career, separating the wins, losses and draws way back in the 1970’s.

                Thanks to Jeffrey Balbalosa. He taught Roberto how to save his games in Chessbase. Currently, Roberto has posted/saved more than 350 of his games way back from 1989 where he lately discovered that he played a game with GM Darwin Laylo in Sept. 25, 1989 at the Manila Mayor’s Cup Open Chess Tournament held at the Manila City Hall. And the result was a draw in 70 moves!

                By knowing themselves, players will improve a lot. SO KNOW YOUR OPPONENT AND YOURSELF.

                In the upcoming 2014 Palau National Chess Championship to be held on Nov. 16, 2014-Jan. 25, 2015, 7^th seed Eugenio Pastrana withdrew because he’s busy with his job on that date. He will be replaced by inactive Gonzalo Escapatoria (1699 rating), if he is available. If not, Nilo de Jesus(1624) or Rafael Paloma (1612) are next in line for the Top 10 division.

                Those who paid their registration fees are Marcial Santander ($20.00), Felix Oling ($20.00), Paquito Suringa, Jr. ($10.00) and Ultei Angelei Surangel ($10.00) in the junior division.

                Solution to last week’s puzzle No. 4433: 1. …Rh1+!! 2. Kxh1 Qh6+ 3. Kg1 Qh2 mate.

                This week’s puzzle No. 4434: Black to move and mates in 3 (Solution next issue)

Source: Chessmate by Roberto Hernandez
             Tia Belau Newspaper
             Page 8
             Volume 23
             Issue 86
             October 27, 2014 

(799) 9-ROUND 2014 PNCC POSTPONED TO NOV. 2 (TBN-Oct. 13, 2014)

:         PHYSICALLY DISABLED, MENTALLY FIT

                  World Chess Federation (FIDE) gives equal right to participate to everybody like IPCA (International Physically Disabled Chess Association). Its top player here, International Master (IM) Russian Andrei Obudchuk, left, played against Palau Board 1 player Roberto Hernandez in the 2^nd round of 2014 World Chess Olympiad in Tromso, Norway. Obudchuk’s teammates are 3 Russians and 1 Italian.      (Photo by Eric Ksau Whipps)   



               9-ROUND 2014 PNCC 
             POSTPONED TO NOV. 2  

TO GIVE more time for chess players to prepare for the 2014 Palau National Chess Championship, it was moved to Nov. 2 – Jan. 25 instead of Oct. 19-Jan. 18 as earlier reported.

                It can be moved again to Nov. 16 if the proposed changes are acceptable to everybody and have 2 extra weeks for awarding and planning for the Top 10 Championship next year.

                The format is all but one round-robin in the Top 10, Women and Junior Section while it’s Swiss system pairing for the Open section, with the winner qualifying in the Championship (Top 10). It’s the first cycle to choose the players that Palau will send to regional tournaments (2015 Oceania Zonal Chess Championship in July and Guam International Chess Tournament/Micronesian Open in February).

                The time control is 75 minutes + 30 seconds increment in the Top 10, Women and Open Section while it is 40 minutes + 30 seconds increment in the Junior Section.

       Agreed draws before the completion of Black’s 30^TH MOVE shall not be allowed. The exceptions are three-fold repetition of position or stalemate before the 30^th move.)

Recording of moves in Algebraic notation (AN) from start to finish is mandatory. Each player must record his previous move before making another move. The player may only record chess moves and the time displayed on the chess clock. The score sheet must have the ability to display the game in its entirety in accepted chess notation. Players should bring their own pencils or pens to record chess notation.

The use of mobile phones and other electronic means of communication inside the playing area while the games are in progress are strictly prohibited. A player who will violate this provision shall lose his/her game by forfeiture.

Defaulting time shall be thirty (30) minutes after the start of each round.

 Tie-Breaks – the following tie-break systems in descending order of priority shall be used to determine the final ranking of the players at the end of the tournament:

a.    Direct Encounter

b.    Buchholz System

c.    Median Buchholz (minus highest and lowest)

d.    S.B. System

e.    Number of wins (forfeit counted)

The prizes are $175.00 for the Top 10 Champion, $125.00 to 2^nd and $100.00 to 3^rd ; Women- 1^st ($125.00), 2^nd ($100.00), 3^rd ($75.00). The junior and open sections have the same cash prizes as: 1^st (100.00), 2^nd ($75.00) and 3^rd ($50.00).

            The registration of members ($10.00) and non-members ($20.00) of this tournament will proceed like the original date (Oct. 12) at Bethlehem Park. Players are requested to bring their chessboards and clocks so that they can practice, familiarize with the rules and socialize to their fellow chess players (old and new). I. D.’s will be issued to members who will pay their registration fees. It’s good for the year 2015.

            Solution to last week’s puzzle: 1. …Nd2+! 2. Rxd2 Rxe1+ 3. Kxe1 Rg1 mate.

            This week’s puzzle: Black to move and mates in 3 (Solution next issue)

Source: Chessmate by Roberto Hernandez

               Tia Belau Newspaper

               Page 8

               Volume 23

               Issue 82

               October 13, 2014